Moving on and letting go...

I came across this today at Soulemama's blog:

Moving on and letting go is scary and good all at the same time...even when we're just talking about yarn. But it does always feel very, very good. New beginnings are exciting.

Be sure to read the rest of the post here.

And I swear that is just what I needed to hear today. I know exactly what she means in terms of life, and in terms of yarn. You see, I haven't been too happy with the way our homeschooling curriculum has been going. It's got some great stuff. I have found though, that we need something more.

What we've been using has felt incomplete, rushed in many ways, and not really connecting with us. It didn't "fit". I knew that something had to give - so I am prepared to unravel it all if necessary to find a fit for us. So, I figured I would look into Unit Studies (a vast switch from where we were before - a combo of well-trained mind/eclectic/unschooling) and other options.

And then, I found this:
http://www.movingbeyondthepage.com/

The big negative for me, is that it is a bit more than I'd like to spend. Although, it seems worth it. And, when you look at the time I've spent researching and planning, finding the right books - this is worth it to me. And there are various pricing options - I don't have to buy the entire kit and kaboodle.

I also like that it is 36 weeks of plans - which saves me time. Although, it is planned, and set up for each day, which isn't as flexible as we've been. If it relieves my stress though, and we can take our time with it - so that isn't a bad thing. And, according to the time requirements, we should still have time if we want to pursue other interests.

What I love, is that it combines many things that I've been drawn to - Waldorf, Montessori, Unschooling, and creative thinking. It also alleviates my fear that I'm missing something, because the national requirements are covered. It saves time planning and researching. Hubby loves it. I love the whole teaching concepts and the way the lessons are broken down. I love how the more I look into it, the more it appeals to me.

To sign up for it means that we'd be getting a late start to the year (although not really when you read about the program - that's the beauty of it), because Pook would be doing the 6-8 whereas 5-7 would be like average first grade.

It also means, that there is a strong possibility Squeak can use it too, because it's interdisciplinary, set up for various grade levels, hands on, and uses auditory, kinetic and visual. Plus, I just love the topics and books it uses.

It means letting go, and starting over, which is hard, as we've already invested in books for Pook this year. So I'm trying not to think about money that's been wasted (although, as most homeschooling families know, sometimes you will go through various curriculum in a year). It also means a bit more commitment on my part.

And you know what? I'm okay with that. Sometimes, you need to unravel things all the way, or a few bits, and start over to make something new or improve on the original.

I've yet to find something about this program, other than the price, that has been negative (for me). In all aspects it's eerily exactly what I've been looking for when I realized the other stuff wasn't working.

Updated: We took the plunge and placed the order. Let the unraveling continue...

One other thing - The Little Travelers

I came across these today for kids:
http://thelittletravelers.com/dvd.htm

Too cool. Also, quite pricey for the time limits of each. But, Pook seems to want them and is interested in them.

Snow day, being true to myself, and living a simple life

I wish I was enjoying this snowy day more than I am, and perhaps, I will by the end of this post, where, my intent is to just get my thoughts out there and get some clarity I suppose.

In case you didn't figure it out - it's snowing here today. It looks like it's now stopped, but for a while, it was really coming down.

You see, I don't like driving in the snow. I prefer to sit at home and enjoy it, and not go out in it unless I absolutely have to. So, after getting everything ready to go today, and, practically in the car, I chickened out, called off taking Pook into Montessori, and came back into the house.

Where, I called hubby for the umteenth time (as I'd been indecisive all morning), to tell him that, uh, we are now not going in. For real this time. And then, I called the friend who's children and in the class, and who is kind enough to let me work at her home until Montessori is out, to tell her.

And, this is where things left me feeling, well, inadequate. Instead of just telling her that I didn't want to drive in the snow, it came across to her that Pook didn't want to go, so I didn't go. (As I was on the phone with her, Pook was whining about getting her gloves off, and saying how she was glad to stay home. I was trying to help her while talking... and, well, if you're a parent, you know how that can go.) Now, there have been times that Pook doesn't want to go, but we've gone anyway. When I don't want to go, and she doesn't want to go, well, that's when we usually (but not always) stay home.

And then, the conversation came up about Saturday, where we've planned a small party for FIL, that we've let Pook help plan. And, instead of just telling her that the ILs didn't want to go, somehow, because she knew Pook was planning it, it turned into her telling me that our problem is that we let Pook decide too much.

*Sigh*

Miscommunications occured on both sides. Mind you, it was a 5 minute conversation, because she had to get her kiddos off to school, and clean off the car. And, part of me is really wondering if it's worth clarifying things, because she's busy planning for Hannukah this week, and their big party on Saturday, that we won't be going to, and which she really wants us to attend. She's also really, really stressed out.

And, I felt bad and didn't want to hurt her feelings, nor did I know if she'd be open to the fact that my ILs do not like going to parties with people they don't know. Now, I'm frustrated that I didn't just spit it out and tell it like it was. However, I've noticed, that when I've only got a 5 mintue time span to chat, and I'm caught offguard on a topic I wasn't expecting to chat about (like Saturday when I was just calling to say we weren't going in today), I don't always come across as clear as I'd like to.

So, I've been sitting her pondering my abilities as a parent, if I'm really a wuss for not wanting to drive in the snow (but if you've been in the car accidents I have, you'd not want to drive in it either!), do I give Pook too many choices - or does it just come across that way sometimes, and the fact that I just want to live a simple life.

After allowing myself to feel a bit inadequate, I started to really think about my life, how I live it, and my parenting skills. I am a first time parent. I do not parent the way most people do, and that is a conscious choice that I've made. I parent in a way that I feel is best for me and my child, and compared my friend I talked to this morning - we parent WAY differently. She's also 20 years older than me. So, there's the generational differences, too.

I do not choose to chaufer my child out to 2 and 3 activities a day, 7 days a week. Her kids apparently love this. My child will choose to stay home and do artwork or school, instead of going out and about. This was something I wanted to do as a child, but never got the chance.

I would prefer to stay home and watch the snow, instead of freaking out about driving in it. And you know what? Pook is right up there next to me, watching out the window.

Could I be parenting better? Maybe. Hey, I'm the first to tell you that I know I'm overprotective, and I know that I don't parent like everyone else (does anyone really?). We choose to do things in a way that works best for us. That's just how we are.

And you know what? I love my life. I LOVE our home and the way we do things. When it comes down to it, we are happy. I'm really happy with the way I parent, and the fact that we choose to do one thing at a time. I like that I can let my 4.5 year old plan a birthday for her grandfather - because she wants to. I think that's why homeschooling will suit us as well, because if we want to stay home and watch the snow - we can, without having to worrying about having to be someplace.

We live a simple life compared to most. I've spent too much of my life caught up in the rushing around, wishing away my time. I choose to enjoy each moment, each now, each hug and kiss and snuggle. I am blessed to have a hubby with a government job, and I hope that he knows how much I adore him for it. I am aware, that things may not always be as they are now. So I make it a point to make the most of it.

I think what's been frustrating me the most, is because we are making our own way, there are many people who've been vocal or quietly voicing opposition to it. Sometimes, I want to create a T-Shirt or sign I can wear around my neck that says:

* Yes, I homeschool, and it really doesn't matter to me how you choose to school your sweet children.
* No, I'm not worried about the socialization of my child.
* Yes, I let my child plan and make guided decisions at the age of four.
* You bet I'm overproctective.
* Yes, I probably parent differently than you. And guess what - that's okay! I don't expect you to parent like me! :)

You know, I don't condemn people for sending kids to public school, or having their children involved in activities 7 days a week, or because they parent differently than me. Because you know what? There aren't set rules for parenting. In the end, you need to do what you think is best for your child. And maybe, just maybe, if we all started supporting each other as parents, instead of believing that there is only one way, the world would be a better place. Just saying...

So you know what? I'm off to make me some hot cocoa. And then, I'm going to bundle up and watch the snow flakes fall. And I'm going to think about how much I adore my husband, and give thanks that I have the choice to stay home and I don't have to feel guilty about it. I'm going to enjoy the day with my daughter, and have fun doing school with her, and even get some work done.

And, eventually, I'll be able to decide if we'll be going to school or not, without calling my hubby for a pep talk, and, who will tell me, "Honey, it's your choice." (I did mention I love him, yes?) And, too, I think I need to learn to start just saying no, without giving a reason and encouraging miscommunications. Besides, have you noticed if you don't give a reason, they can't argue with you? :)

I wish you all a wonderful day. May you be blessed to see and bask in the moments, because they are moments, and they won't last.

A sweet week

It's been a good week this week. It's been one of those mind-blowingly creative, inspiringly productive, let's-get-up-and-dance-when-the-music-plays -a-good-beat type of weeks. OH what fun!

Pook has been really into her alphabet computer game, and doing these practice writing worksheets. This has actually given me time to *gasp!* read and do other crafty projects. She's been really enjoying drawing, we've been reading her Lady Bug magazines together, and I've even had the opportunity to start looking into homschool programs. Who knew there were SO many?

We did get snow on Wednesday; however, it's melting fast, and the signs of spring and longer days are definitely here. Especially in my dining room, and around the house. Slowly, I've been removing the winter decorations, and replacing them with more floral things. I was so inspired, that I decided to sew new place mats, and to create table runners, and Pook was helping me and ready to learn how to sew, and... then my sewing machine broke.

So, I made do with a few stiches to hold things in place until I can get a sewing machine, or borrow one. I was not to be deterred from the yummy yellow fabric I wanted to see on my table! :)

And with that, I wish you all a Happy Friday, and a weekend with spring goodness admist the winter!

Everything, and anything can be a learning experience

The hibernation isn't quite going as planned, but that's okay. I'm using this post as a sounding board more or less, as I've been asked to take part in a leading a workshop that encourages parents to celebrate the seasons with their children. I've also been pondering how to make homeschooling (or HS as I'll be referring to it hereon) more of a priority in our lives.

And so, I'm here. Putting forth my thoughts into this electronic media for you dear readers!

In regards to HS, I've decided to start displaying HS stuff around the house for inspiration and encouragement. There are 5 areas that I do my best to focus on with Pook each day:

* Words - Reading, writing, and phonics
* Numbers - Counting, Math
* Music/Dance - Listening, dancing, singing, making, appreciating
* Art - Painting, sculpting, drawing, etc.
* Nature - doing something that relates to the outdoors
* Creative Play - This is based on books from Oak Meadow. It's when she plays on her own.

In order to encourage these priorities, I've decided to really start incorporating the HS aspects into our decor.

Words:
Books can be found in almost every room of our home. On second thought, at this very moment, there are books in everyroom of our home!

I'm infamous for posting quotes, affirmations, and meaningful words. There are magnetic letters on the fridge that we trace with our fingers. Before bed is the mandatory reading with Daddy (and sometimes Mommy). In the morning (on good days), Pook and I sit and read together.

She can already write an H, but until she shows more interest, I'm not pushing the writing aspect yet. But there are plenty of line tracing activities I can encourage her to do if she's interested, and that she can do as she gets older.

In regards to phonics, we haven't done much work with that, but we will. Another neat thing to do, is to make bread dough or play dough into letters.

Numbers:
Decorwise - they appear on our fridge with the magnetic letters. She is constantly counting and sorting things on her own, so numbers are pretty easy. I haven't quite figured how else I plan on displaying them, although, she does have object on her nature table she can count and sort. Also, games like Candyland, Chutes and Ladders, etc. encourage counting too.

Music/Dance:

Our home is usually always filled with music. Each meal we usually play a CD. And, when we are cleaning or cooking, music usually fills the air. Occasionally, you'll find all of us (even Daddy) breaking into dance. In the kitchen. Alone or all together.

Art:

To encourage art, I've created a table centerpiece that displays all kinds of good art supplies on the kitchen table. Using jars, I've put out markers, crayons, paint brushes, chalk, and other inspirational goodies.

I keep them on a tray, for easy removal from the table when we have guests. They encourage Pook to draw and create each day. As an artist, and a believer that art and creative expression is important, this is a big one for me. Already, I've got most of the learning stuff put on shelves in the dinning room for easy access.

Nature:

Recently, we've created a nature table for Pook. A nature table is a great way for kids to be indoors, and there is a vast amount of information out there on them. However, let me tell you what we are doing. The table changes each season. Right now, we're on winter (even though it feels like freakin spring.)

There's a blue towel with snowflakes on it; a stuffed snowman; a kailidoscope (scuse the spelling); a woven bowl with acorn caps, a pine cone (it's on the list to find/get more), 3 dradles, a few seashells; a bowl of rocks; a vase with sticks from the tree outside (that was budding *sigh*); a cool shaped stick from a walk at Oregon Ridge long ago; her fairy wands; and a basket filled with wintery, snowy, and Christmassy books.

Each season the books and cloth will change accordingly, as we discuss what occurs with weather, plants, animals, etc.. On Thursday, we plan to make homemade pinch pots that will enable her to create art, and sort items like acorn caps, sea shells, sticks, and other nature goodies.

When we go for walks, or visits, I encourage her to find rocks, leaves, and the like to keep on her table. Many things on her table have a story to go with them, which make them even cooler. Even when she leaves the nest, I think I shall keep a spot for a nature table in our home. It's become that precious to me.

Creative Play:

All of her toys are easily displayed and in easy reach. Hopefully, she'll have a kitchen set for her birthday. She just got a doll house for her birthday. If you think of how a nursery school is set up (corner to keep coats, store, dress-up area, kitchen/house area, blocks, art area, reading area, doll house, car area, snack area, etc.), you'll get the idea of how we are setting up our home to reflect this.

Already, I've got most of the learning stuff put on shelves in the dinning room for easy access.

I don't have a formal schedule as of yet, and she is involved in a Kindermusik class (if you have kids, I cannot reccomend this program enough - and it starts with birth until age 7) throughout the year. This program tackles all these things, and then some.

What I like best about HS, is that every day is a learning experience - for all of us. For instance, a day at our friends' farm means outdoors and in nature. She gathers and counts the eggs (numbers). She plays the piano (music). She plays in the water (creative play). She come home, and curls up in bed to read with Daddy.

As you can see, even if you are choosing not to HS, you can still incorporate these ideas for your own child. I find, that if you make learning fun, and realize you do it everyday, it makes the whole experience more amazing. You'd be surprised what you gain from it as well!

Tis a Gift to be Simple

It's been a hectic, but fun weekend. I am excited about Christmas this year, as we've seriously cut down on giftgiving, and found some neat gifts to give instead. For those of you who are just joining in, we are in the midst of house hunting, and saving. Thus, we are on a budget.

By mutual agreement, with are not exchanging gifts with the BILs, my SIL, and the SO. We are giving gifts to my sweet nephew though. And, I've been stocking his up for some time I admit. And, I didn't realize just how relaxing it is, as I don't have to worry about what to get anymore. It helps too, that we are all saving money at the moment.

I admit, we've already gone a bit off budget, when I found the Pook a doll house for Christmas, that was over budget, but at 50% off for the house and furniture, irresistable. Plus, I could just see in my head how I wanted to present it to her.

I am really excited about my latest discovery though: http://www.heifer.org/. You can check out the site to find out more about it.

This site has solved many things for me. I now have a gift for the people who have everything, and I feel that I'm doing something good with my gift. Plus, I like knowing that in someway, I'm making a contribution to someone who can really use it, in the name of another. Plus, it's just cool to donate honey-bees, chickens, or a llama. :)

For the lucky ones in our family, we'll be baking them mini loaves of gingerbread, zuchini bread, banana nut bread, and pumpkin bread. Complete with recipes. The breads are healthier then cookies, and for sweet grandmas who no longer can cook homeade things, a real treat. (Apparently, Dad's like them too!)

I want to teach Pook the importance behind the gift, not the gift itself. I've been craving simplicity (usually happens after a few weeks of choas), and last year was rather stressful figuring stuff out. This year, we are buying a few things, but, they are clutter free, something wanted, or things I'd picked up throughout the year.

This will be the last year, for a while, when we try to make it back for Christmas. And, I'm looking forward to Christmas at home for a change. I love seeing and spending time with the family, but, the Santa myth really looses something. Not that we've really done anything to encourage that myth...

On the homeschooling front, I'm really excited, because a friend of mine and I decided to start our own little support group. There are quite a few coops in the area, and I have connections, but to meet every week has been challenging with the other activities. So, we've decided on once a month; however, it might be twice a month. I'm also going to sign up for one of the field trips groups as well.

I am just so psyched about the whole process. I'm looking forward to learning with her, starting a nature journal, creating projects... I have decided, that if she ever decides she wants to attend regular school, she'll have that choice. However, most of the kids I know that are homeschooled love the freedom and choices they have.

So, today, I'm just filled with that sense of wonder and contentment. I've gotten confirmation I'm on the right path with Pook, and things are again falling into place.